A baby soon, 2016

Peacar, winter, 2016
Johan is 55, Myra and Naraj are 21, Udar is 12

narrated by Udar

It's been really weird around here. Dad has been spending a lot of time visiting Naraj and when he's not doing that, he's reading for work.

I don't go with him when he visits Naraj. I don't have anything to say, so I don't say anything at all. I do keep up with the story in the paper. It's weird, knowing the names behind the headlines "2 hostages killed in shoot-out". Dad is grateful that Naraj is ok, at least physically, but Dad talks about how Naraj will need time to heal. That seeing your girlfriend killed in front of you takes time to get over. I'm not dumb, I know that it's hard to get over a death. I mean, I still miss mom...even though they think I'm over it and I'm ok, I still miss her. 

So I mostly drink cups of cold coffee, 

clean up around the house

or talk to the fish.

Sometimes I go to The Pulse with the other teens. I like playing video games with my cousin, Amyra. She talks so much that I don't have to contribute to the conversation. She wants to be a television journalist with her own political spin show. She's on the debate team and she's really good, so I know she will probably get her own show when she's older.

I don't like seeing all the psuedo couples and kisses though.

My cousin, Chase, is very popular it seems with the ladies. I'm not sure if they know just how popular he is.

Things got interesting around here. We hosted an exchange student, Plumeria. Her name is odd, but it fits her. She does smell like plumerias. 

We tend to spend a lot of time at the house since dad is working extra long hours.

We mostly talk and try things out.

I like trying things out with her. She lets me touch her sometimes.

I like how she giggles when I do that.

One time, dad had an evening faculty meeting and then he was taking Naraj out for dinner, which meant that Plumeria and I had the house to ourselves.

She said she wanted to try some things that she read in her magazine. We woohoo'd and I thought it was awesome! I mean, I think every guy thinks that.  It must not have been that bad since we still woohoo sometimes when dad isn't around.

Before Plumeria left to return home, she was sick. I heard her throwing up in the bathroom that morning. Thankfully she was not too sick for us to say a proper goodbye.

It's quieter since she left, but not that much. 

I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night from the noise of our neighbors.
Now I know exactly what is going on when I hear those noises on the other side of the wall. Sometimes I listen, 

other times I bang on the wall.

That usually quiets them down.

My sister, Myra, thinks that dad leaves me alone too much, so sometimes she comes over with Abel and sit until I come home from school.

I think they're trying to have a baby soon. They asked dad some advice about when to have children.

He said some weird stuff about when the music stops playing it will be their time. That makes no sense at all.

I think dad isn't comfortable with us kids, especially me. I think it's cause I look the most like mom. I see him out at night, staring at the sky and mumbling. Doesn't he get it, mom isn't coming back and she can't talk to him from the stars either, so I don't know why he keeps sitting out there in the cold.

Things are going to change again. I knew it when I heard dad cooking one morning. He's not the best cook, so he avoids it when he can.

He said that we needed to talk. I hoped it wasn't about Plumeria. I hope he didn't find out what we did in his bed...and his desk.

Instead, he said that it was time for us to move. We needed to downsize, the rent was too high and I would be going to university soon, or at least moving out. 

So we're moving. Even though he said it was for me, and I would benefit, I know that he's thinking about his future and having to support house payments with his retirement. I wonder what Plumeria is up to.
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