Almost A Typical Family, 2010

Havar, fall, 2010
Tobi is 38; Aaron and Simora are 11; Matt is 7 (Li Yoo is 38)

They actually have had dates now.

Is This It?, 2009

Peacar, winter, 2009Li is 37. Tobi Sweeny is 37, Aaron and Simora are 10, Matt is 6.

Li feels like her life is stuck in autopilot.

Can't Cry Hard Enough, 2007

Remar, summer, 2007

Li Yoo is 35,Tobi Sweeny is 35

Supposed to Feel, 2006

Hapar, spring, 2006
Li Yoo is 34

How are you supposed to feel?

On one hand, Li felt deep pain over losing her child. Her heart ached and her soul was raw with emotions. Even her newest purchase of the cutest little "it" purse did nothing to help the pain and shopping was Li's pain salve.

On the other hand, she felt nothing. She didn't have anything that reminded her of the young child. His existance in her apartment was temporal, never longer than a few hours.

She had a lack of family photos to remind her of his smiling face. After his death, she put up the photo from Kimikura, his last trip.

She wished she could say that she put the photo up in rememberance of him, but part of her thinks that she put it up due to guilt.

What kind of mother wasn't there? There wasn't an example for the type of mothering Li did.

She wasn't an unfit mother, her friends agreed over slippery noodles and nectar.

They had arrived one by one,

bringing bottles of nectar and the latest bestseller.

They had come with news of their own, new hairstyles and new degrees.

However, they really came to simply be with thier friend.

Doing what they could to coax a smile.

She didn't abandon her children, they pointed out. She was there for the important events,

birthdays, graduations from kindergarten, funerals...

If she was a man, she wouldn't be struggling with this.

Everyday men give up primary custody to their children. Seeing them twice a month, a month in the summer and every other holiday.

They were not condemned. They were not accused of being unfit. They did not struggle with guilt.

Instead, they were applauded when they picked up the children for making time in their busy lives for the little ones that they helped create.

No one judged them.

She didn't blame herself. She knew better than that. She knew that she couldn't have prevented his death. She couldn't have prevented his sickness.

She tried to continue her life as if nothing had happened. She didn't mention his name to Krissy, the intern at the office when the young woman came over to visit with a friend of hers. They brought casserole which Li welcomed as she was growing tired of takeout.

Li recognized Krissy's friend. They had met before Ping's death, before things had gotten complicated. She didn't call him back, he was too young for her tastes. Besides, now it was too complex. She doubted he would understand, losing a child that truthfully you barely knew aside from the monthly visits.

He convinced her to dance while Krissy warmed up the meal. Li tried to move to the music, but her body wouldn't listen. Her limbs jerked strangely to the rhythm and her head bobbed as if it was being shaken by an angry child.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled and rushed to the safety of her apartment. The couple left soon afterwards, leaving Li with warm casserole and an empty heart.

Her normal routine helped to ground her. The familar pain of her knuckles hitting the bag and sweat running down her cheek dulled the conflicting thoughts in her head.

As a mother, shouldn't she feel more? But grief was different for each-some worked through their grief, others cried through it.

Her neighbor, Erika Moore, invited her to watch a movie in the movie viewing room. She arrived downstairs early and to pass the time, checked her mail and picked up an abandoned book.

The Temptress, the title read. Li sat on the sofa of the renovated community room and opened the book. She shouldn't feel like this. Roger wasn't at all what she wanted...but maybe he was what she needed.

"There you are," Erika said startling Li.

"How was your day?"

"The same," Erika answered. "I did a few designs and then networked looking for more clients. This really handsome man came by your place today looking for you. Very yummy."

Li laughed, "That was my ex-husband."

"Oh," Erika said. Darnit is what she thought. "You know what this movie needs?"

"What?"

"Some strong nectar cocktails."

"I wouldn't mind one of those."

"We should go out for some soon. I still haven't found a good bar."

"There are not that many."

"Oh...well Ms.City Planner, you need to add that to your to-do list."

Li laughed, "I'll try."

---

• Li didn't have even feelings or thoughts about Ping's death. I had to check to make sure her memory registered it. It did, but considering that she's permaplat due to topping her career, there wasn't much of an effect. She did have increased wants for Tobi in terms of calling and talking with him. I didn't trust those two in their grief and I imagine Cameron wouldn't be so tolerant anymore now that she's pregnant again.

• Erika Moore might be familar to some of you who followed Pahala Shore. I missed my old characters and decided that some of them would make the move to Apple Valley as non-playables. Erika is the first to arrive. She bumped into Tobi who was leaving the apartment complex while Li was at work and started heart farting over him and rolling up some inappropiate wants. Erika, you do not want that man.

Always Did, 2005

Givar, winter, 2005

Tobi is 33; Cameron Smith is 28, Ping, Aaron and Simora are 6; Matt is 2, Craig Smith is 3 simlonic months

Tobi sighed as he flipped the pages of the newspaper. He wasn't bored, not in the least bit. He just felt at a standstill. He couldn't go any higher with the force due to his lack of a university degree. Heck, the position he was currently in shouldn't be his thanks to the new educational requirements, thankfully he was grandfathered in. Tobi didn't want to be a detective all his career, but the bosses had made it clear that this was the last stop on the train for him. If he wanted something different he would have to leave the force and try a new career. Even if he returned to the force, he would never be able to climb as high as he was now.

Tobi tossed the paper aside and headed upstairs to spend some quality time with his son. Matt was growing bigger everyday. Currently the little boy was enchanted with his nose and the items he could pull from there as well as push in there.

His youngest, Craig, was entering the cooing stage. Tobi babbled a bit with the infant who responded in coos and drool.

The triplets were growing bigger every day. They were enjoying school and making friends. However, they were still each others best friends.

They perferred each other as opposed to outsiders.

They even made time for their younger brothers, which was a relief for Tobi. He didn't want them to become too wrapped up in their trio that they forgot about their other siblings.

Thankfully Julio was nearby whenever Tobi wanted some adult conversation. The Wilsonoffs had moved next door a few simlonic months ago which was a godsend.

Tobi finally had someone to chat with concerning the latest scores.

Not that Cameron wouldn't listen, she did, but she was busy with her new job. As soon as she returned from work she would spend some time with Craig before opening her books.

She insisted that she had to stay abreast of the newest algae species so that she knew what she was looking for. Tobi tried not to allow her to see his eyes glaze over.

Usually whenever she started talking about algae, Tobi did what he did best. Kiss.

He was getting over his ex-wife, finally. Li had turned down his offer for a family vacation, which was probably just as well as it allowed him to reconnect with Cameron. He truly loved her, he did. Didn't every sim go through a phase of wondering what they had left behind. The curse of the chouldas, shouldas and wouldas.

Funny, his thoughts never turned to Ginger. He hadn't seen her in simlonic months. He had heard that she was pregnant and that they had recently adopted a little girl. He smirked to himself, if he had ended up with Ginger perhaps the family would be eating better.

"After dinner you can play Puzzleit on the computer," Cameron offered Aaron who had completed all his homework on time.

"We should take the triplets out to celebrate," Tobi mentioned in light of their recent school reports.

"We could go to the movies,"

"Yea, the new LlamaRama movie is coming out. Please, please, please."

"I don't know...we'll have to discuss it." Tobi promised.

"Ping, you're quiet." Cameron noticed.

"I don't feel good."

"Why don't you lay down on the couch," Tobi urged concerned. He had recieved a note stating that Ping had tested positive for the Plumbbob Virus and as a result would probably feel tired.

Most of the family was upstairs, except for Tobi. He was washing dishes when he heard it. First a soft cough, then it got louder as though his son was choking.

"Quick, call the doctors!" He yelled as he tried to help his son take breaths of air.

Eventhough Julio and Suzanna arrived within minutes, it was too late.

Ping had breathed his last.

It was so sudden that it took the family by surprise.

The official report was that Ping died from complications of the Plumbbob Virus, but Tobi insisted that he wasn't that sick.

Aaron took it the hardest. Ping was not only his brother, but his best friend.

The morning of the memorial service, Cameron found Aaron sobbing in his room staring at Ping's empty bed. She tried to comfort him as best as she could, but she felt so inadequate in that aspect.

After the steady stream of visitors had died down, the family took a break and sat on the couch. Matt and Craig were asleep and the fridge was stocked of food. The voices of the visitors still rang in her ears.

"I'm so sorry for your loss,"

"He's in a better place,"

"Let us know if you need anything."

Of course, they rarely directed their words to her. As if she didn't feel grief for the boy she considered her soon. No, those words were reserved for Li and Tobi. Tobi with his worn face etched with deep wrinkles from nights spent sobbing and Li standing nearby with her stony empty eyes. It was the only time Cameron didn't feel intimidated by her, instead she felt sorrow for the woman.

Cameron sat down after putting the last pie in the fridge. She felt numb to the events surrounding her. Her ears could hear Aaron asking if Ping would haunt them like the scary movies and Tobi's response.

She heard Simora's muffled sniffles as she cuddled close to her mother

and Aaron cuddled in his father's arms.

There was no one for Cameron to cuddle with and she felt out of place. As if she didn't belong in the midst of the family's sorrow.

She excused herself as the familar wave of nausea came over her. She didn't know when she would break the news to Tobi that they were expecting again. She had planned to tell him that night...the night Ping left them and of course she didn't...and she couldn't bring herself to say anything now. This baby was surrounded with sorrow and she wondered if she would even be able to carry it to term.

It wasn't something she could dwell on. She would tell Tobi soon, not tonight and probably not tomorrow, but soon she would tell the family. For now, she just sat and felt the sorrow wrap around her and at the same time she swore she could hear Ping's laughter, as if he would come running downstairs too fast as he always did. How she wished he would come running through the house too fast.

---

• 
  
  Ping died as the ROS. I never had to do this for a child
• 
  
  Aaron really took it hard. He was crying all the time. He could be eating and then start crying or walking to bed and start crying. I was ok with the death until I saw Aaron break down like that.

• 
  
  Cameron is due Remar 2006