What I'm Looking For, Part 1, 2006

Lovar, spring, 2006

Krissy Thorn and Bill Carr are seniors, Emma Seavey is a junior, Susie MacAstral and Benjamin Endeavor are sophmores, S'Ahmisa Warwick and Verde Herendez are freshmen.

S'Ahmisa hurried down the pathway to the waiting shuttle desperate to get out of the rain. Finally it was spring break and she was taking her much anticipated vacation. She tried not to think about the numerous changes she had to make to her plans. She and Verde had planned the trip their senior year, securing a room and submitting their deposit to the Montalcino vineyard. She sighed. That was when they were still a couple. Of course, going together would be awkward to say the least. Thankfully, Rashid agreed to go with her on her spring break trip. She thought that he would say no especially since she wasn't sure if she wanted to be just friends or something more with him. She had left the Hills on a sour note with Rashid, he didn't even show up to see her off at the airport and she knew that university wasn't that important to him.
 

 
She admited that he intrigued her. He seemed to go through life so carefree without any worries. She loved that feeling when she was with him. As if she were free to do whatever she wanted without worrying about making a mistake or ruining her future career.

 
Other times he annoyed her. Like when he ran straight to the one video game machine that the vineyard had.

 
She wanted to believe that he had ambition and dreams, but that they were different than hers. Sometimes she wondered if he even thought beyond his next video game or high score. With the plans she had in store for her life, she needed a man with ambition and dreams. She knew that if she and Rashid were to get together that they wouldn't last and what was the point of getting into something if you knew it would end in disaster. However, she couldn't deny the faint butterflies in her belly when he smiled at her.
 
Her mom said not to worry about things, just enjoy life. However, even though she loved her mother dearly, her mom was very similar to Rashid. S'Ahmisa giggled, she could see the two of them egging each other on over a spirited video game.
 
Maybe she should just let things go and enjoy life a bit more...or at least enjoy her glass of ale.
 
"I can't believe you talked me into ordering ale at a vineyard."
 
Rashid grinned, "Live a little, take risks, drink ale at a vineyard."
 
S'Ahmisa laughed.
 
"Excuse me, the shuttle is here to take you on the tour of the valley."
 
"Yea, let's go, Rashid."
 
"Um, you sure I can't stay here. I'm so close to beating the high score."

 
"Are you serious?"
 
"Naw, boo, I'm just playing." Rashid said smiling. He was glad she had changed out of that knit dress and was showing a bit of skin. If he was smarter, he would have tried to get her in a bikini last summer, but unfortunately he didn't think about it until later.
 
---

 
"Wasn't that more fun than your video game?" S'Ahmisa asked after the tour.
 
Rashid briefly wondered if she wanted the truth before indulging her with an answer. "Yea, of course. You hungry? I'm starving."
 
"I think I'm going to try the mint and pepper glazed steak, what about you?"

 
"The pasta looks good."
 
After they placed their orders, the couple sat in silence.

 

"To a wonderful trip,"
 
"I second that."

 

"Thanks again for coming with me," S'Ahmisa grinned. "I'm glad you didn't mind the seperate rooms."

"No biggie, cutie." Rashid lied. He had been hoping that maybe this would be the time, but the seperate rooms put a halt to his thoughts and actions. Perhaps it was better, he had been having second thoughts about S'Ahmisa, especially after last summer's concert and the way she had dissed him by calling for Elmer. He wondered if she had seen that singer since she had returned to Apple Valley. Sometimes he wondered if things would have been different if he was still with Tyisha. He knew that he wouldn't be on the other side of the simworld with a pretty lady like S'Ahmisa, but he also wouldn't be anywhere with Tyisha since her father kept her on lock down most of the time and besides, her behavior annoyed him sometimes. Rashid sighed, regardless of how his thoughts were concerning S'Ahmisa, he still wanted what most young men his age wanted from an attractive woman and the seperate rooms were not faciliating that.

"Let's toast," S'Ahmisa urged, ordering two glasses of a medicore sparkling nectar.

"What should we toast to?"

"Umm, I have no idea."

"Ok, to having no idea." Rashid said raising his glass.

"And being young and free," S'Ahmisa added.

"This is amazing," she moaned as the food arrived to the table. Rashid couldn't help but smile as he watched her face contort in joyful bliss.

"Here, try mine, cutie."

S'Ahmisa leaned over to taste Rashid's pasta dish. "Oh, it's orgasmic."

Rashid nearly choked.

"E-excuse me?"

"Your pasta. It tastes orgasmic. I love the way the butter melts on my tongue and how it blends with the flavor of the organic herbs."

Rashid tried to control his thought for the remainder of the meal before rushing to his room for a nice, long, cold shower.

---

S'Ahmisa smiled as the man worked out her tense muscles. Last night was almost too much for her to bear. After watching Rashid throughly enjoy his dinner, S'Ahmisa had to retreat to her room for a date with herself. She wondered if the seperate rooms were a little bit too much. Part of her wanted to rip Rashid's clothes off with her teeth in the middle of the vineyard...the other part of her kept her restrained. She had her future to think about.

As she slinked into the hot springs with Rashid and saw how his first year of university was shaping his muscles, she seriously doubted that her proposal to be celibate would last very long. She mentally reminded herself to recall the look on Benjamin's face when he got the call that he was a father, the rumors of Bill's own baby that was given up for adoption and she painfully forced herself to recall the drama and gossip that circulated around the hoods with Rashid's own brush with fatherhood. Children were no where in the picture for her at this time and if she was honest with herself...perhaps not even a relationship.

She still felt ashamed of herself for her actions last summer. She knew that she had hurt Rashid, but that kiss in the library shook her up a little bit. Especially since she was still technically Verde's girlfriend. She tried to push Rashid away, to protect her heart and salvage her relationship with Verde, but she knew even before that day in the library that she and Verde were no longer compatible and wanted different things in life. She knew that the expiration date on thier relationship was nearing it's term and that she was open to possibilities. But was Rashid a possibility? Maybe she should listen to her mother and enjoy her youth.

"What's on your mind, cutie?" Rashid asked watching her face cloud with unspoken thoughts. She always seemed so serious and Rashid could count the number of times that he truly saw her smile. When she smiled that pretty open mouth grin that crinkled her nose and squished her eyes, his heart seemed to skip a beat. He also didn't mind the tiny bikini that hugged her curves. He forced himself to keep his hands locked behind his head in an effort to not lunge at her.

"Just thinking if you should give me a back massage or rub my feet when I beat you at log rolling."

"You mean, if you should rub my feet when I beat you." he laughed.

After successfully handing Rashid his ego on a platter after log rolling

and striking a fear in him with her demonstration of her ax throwing skills

the couple returned to the vineyard tired but happy.

"I think since I had a massage earlier, then you should rub my feet."

"I'm not touching your stinky toes."

"My toes don't stink." She screamed chasing him into the courtyard.

"Stinky feet, stinky feet!" He teased tickling her.

"No, no, stop!" S'Ahmisa said gasping for air and clinging to Rashid.

She's not sure who turned first or how their lips knew where to go, but she was so glad that his hands made their way up her back.

She was even more pleased as they drifted to her waist

as he leaned her back to deepen the kiss.

For a moment, his lips on her neck made her forget that they were in the courtyard of a public vineyard,

but as she felt him move lower, her rational thoughts returned to her.

"Rashid, I can't."

"Boo, we're only kissing."

"I-I know, it's just..."

Rashid sighed and took her hands. "Listen, cutie. I can't continue to do this hot and cold thing ok. You need to make up your mind."

"It's...it's complicated," she tried feebly to explain as she trained her eyes on the setting sun.

She could see him gritting his teeth, causing the vein on the side of his head to pulse with frustration. It was complicated, she convinced herself. Her life was mapped out for her to become mayor, her choices predetermined and each step of her journey would only serve to strengthen her claim to become mayor. Fiona had arranged internships including the one in Simmington Hills and was working on the one in Riverdale this summer. S'Ahmisa knew that she was the chosen successor as spokesim of the hood, even her professors knew it, chosing to phrase things as "when" she was spokesim and mayor, not "if". It was her dream, her destiny even, she knew that she couldn't and wouldn't let that go.

On the other hand, Rashid was the eldest son of a successful mayor, his life was tied up in his hood. The favored son of a prominent family that doted on him. His family would never allow him to leave the hood, especially with his younger brother Marchon wrapped up with his girlfriend in Riverdale and showing no signs of returning. S'Ahmisa knew from living with Mrs. Tomika Cunningham that the woman would never allow her baby to leave. Even Mayor Cunningham was emotional about his sons being in university. She also knew that Rashid didn't want to leave. He enjoyed the recognition and perks of being the son of a mayor and successful lieutenant, both honored founders of the hood.

 "If...if it's so complicated then," Rashid finally spoke. "We should just end this."

"Wha-"

"I'll just get the next plane out, you can enjoy the rest of this vacation alone. Maybe it will help you think."

"Rashid, don't be upset."

"I'm not upset, cutie." Rashid said reaching for her. "However, I can see that you need your space right now. I respect that and I hope you respect that space isn't what I'm looking for right now."
----
S'Ahmisa and Rashid at the Aerial Bionic Concert ; S'Ahmisa's Internship in Simmington Hills; Benjamin is a father; Bill is a father; Rashid's brush with fatherhood;