Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Days Are Gone, 2019

Optional Soundtrack: Days Are Gone-HAIM

Ashlee, or Lee as she preferred to be called now, sat on the ground and took another long drag of the cigarette.

Some nights the temptation was too strong, the dreams were too real and the demons clawed at her legs desperate to drag her down. She would sneak outside to smoke. It was such a small vice, compared to her past indulgences. 

The pills, the bubbles, the needles, the thin lines of powder, the blunts full of who knows what, all chased down with bottles and bottles and more bottles of burning liquid. Until that day.

And I got back up
When I lost control over it all, over it all

And I knew that I couldn´t take no more

Sometimes the past didn't want to let her go, so she would count the stars, reminding the demons.

All the times I´ve said it
All the times I´ve said it before

Those days are gone

She would inhale slowly, savoring the burnt flavor on her tongue and exhale clouds into the cool nights. 

She would trace her numerous tattoos and remind herself of the small victories, the crazy times and even the regrets that each ink or cover up meant to her.

Sometimes I wish I didn´t miss you at all

Those days are gone

Holding on, holding on, holding on
Those days are gone
And now I´m waiting for the day to dawn
Those days are gone

Occasionally her papi would join her wordlessly. She would pass the pack over to him and he would silently take one, light it and sit next to her. She would notice that he too would trace his tattoos, ripe in meaning for him as well. 

She never noticed that when she was younger, but now...things were so very different. They would talk about their temptations and the holds of the past. How horrible it was.

I gave it all, I gave you my all
You only took one side
When all my hopes ran dry

Together they would talk about the future
I´m moving on
You can have my past, I´ll never get that back

I´m moving on, ´cause those days are gone

until Lee felt better. 

Her papi would take her into his arms and repeat the same words he said every time. "I'm glad you're home."

Tonight was different, tonight she actually responded. "I'm sorry for leaving. I made such a mess of everything. Esther won't even talk to me. I don't even know Amyra and Chase and-"

He cut her off. "That's in the past, those days are gone."


  1. It's great that Lee has been able to reforge that link with her dad. The relationships with the rest of her family might be salvaged in time too - I hope so, anyway.

    1. I'm hoping Lee and Esther will come around. Lee has repaired her relationship with her other family members, but Esther still resents her. Thanks for reading and commenting.

  2. Aww I'm glad that she has her Dad, it seems that he really understands her and what she needs right now. I hope that she's able to repair broken relationships in time. I like that she goes by Lee now, kind of taking control of herself and life with that. Where do you get your tattoo boxes if you don't mind me asking, you have some that I haven't seen before.

    1. I have the standard tattoo boxes, but I used multiple ones to make new/bigger ones, so many of her tattoos are just overlaps

      Thanks for reading and commenting


Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment! :)

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